Now many crowds were going along with Him, and He turned and said to them, 26 “If anyone comes to Me, and does not hate his own father and mother and wife and children and brothers and sisters, yes, and even his own life, he cannot be My disciple. 27 Whoever does not carry his own cross and come after Me cannot be My disciple. 28 For which one of you, when he wants to build a tower, does not first sit down and calculate the cost to see if he has enough to complete it? Luke 14:25-35 Read verses 29-35 on the site.
During all my Flesh-bound years as a born again believer, I read the passage above (Luke 14:25-35) innumerable times. I had an understanding of it, but I have found since I became Spirit-led that I was wrong all along. I had assumed someday I would learn to enjoy church enough and develop a deeper love and devotion to the Lord through that. Boy was that stupid!
The very day I surrendered to the Lord by submitting to His Lordship in every part of my life, in August 2004, I experienced the deepest love for the Lord imaginable. It has never diminished. It is constantly growing deeper. I was doing many self-evaluations during those days and I remember being totally amazed at the changes in me. My value system had been completely altered. Of course, now I know why. The Lord had circumcised my heart. That hard layer separating my conscience from my Mind, my Will, and my Emotions had been crushed and cut away. God’s value system was now apparent to my Soul. It was the most humbling yet exhilarating thing I have ever gone through rivaling even the day of my salvation.
I was deep into the Word through it all, which is key. God was writing His Word on my heart. I found myself in worship at times so deep I would be weeping and weeping in total devotion and adoration of my Lord never wanting it to end. God was reshaping my heart constantly. Why? I was spending the vast majority of my time in His presence. I was seeking His face with all sorts of deep questions about doctrine and this spiritual walk. He blessed me with an overwhelming understanding in every area in which He led me to pray. It was and still is very humbling. Moreover, He did it all.